Arlene Abelove Ritter Sharkey
Arlene Abelove Ritter Sharkey, beloved wife, mother, educator, and friend, passed away peacefully on August 31st after a brief battle with endometrial cancer. She was 75 years old.
Born in Philadelphia to Martin Abelove and Sylvia Kaplan Abelove, Arlene welcomed her sister Gail two years later and was a devoted older sister throughout their lives. She dedicated her life to learning and teaching, beginning with earning her BA in English from Temple University, MA in Education from University of Minnesota, and MA in Literacy from Michigan State University. Arlene was a passionate educator for 30 years in Canada and the United States, serving as Principal of the Religious School at Kehillat Israel and as a literacy teacher in Michigan public schools. She touched countless lives with her dedication to nurturing young minds and her innovative teaching methods.
Arlene first married Dr. Kenneth Ritter in 1971 and they welcomed their daughter Elissa Leigh in 1979. Sadly, Kenneth lost his battle to Lupus shortly after. In 1989, she found love again with Joel Allan Sharkey. They married August 12th, 1990 and together they built a beautiful life in Lansing, Michigan and recently celebrated their 35th wedding anniversary.
Arlene had a radiant smile that lit up every room and an infectious warmth that drew people to her. She loved bringing family together and found her greatest joy in her nine grandchildren, never missing their milestones and celebrations.
She was preceded in death by her parents Martin and Sylvia Abelove, her beloved sister Gail and first husband Ken. She is survived by her devoted husband Joel; daughter Elissa Ritter Vaughan and her husband Matt Vaughan; stepdaughter Elisa Sharkey and husband Marc Lao; stepson Jonah Sharkey and wife Kara Hensey Sharkey; and nine cherished grandchildren: Stella, Emma, Andrew, Henry, Isabel, Merin, Susanna, Frances, and Bea.
Arlene’s legacy of love, learning, and service will continue to inspire all who knew her. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations be made to First Book or the Kehillat Israel Religious School in honor of Arlene’s lifelong dedication to literacy and her belief that every child deserves access to quality books and her love of Jewish education.
Funeral services will be held at 10:30 a.m. on Sunday, September 7, 2025 at the Estes-Leadley Greater Lansing Chapel, 325 W. Washtenaw St., Lansing, MI with Rabbi Matthew Kaufman, Ph.D officiating. Livestream will be available. Interment will follow at Evergreen Cemetery in Lansing.
36 Messages to “Arlene Abelove Ritter Sharkey”
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Terence Davis
September 2, 2025 at 2:41 pmWhat a wonderful life she had and was lucky enough to find love with my friend, Joel. Peace be with you.
Betty Seagull
September 2, 2025 at 2:43 pmMissing my dear friend so much already. She was a light to everyone who knew her. Wishing peace to her family and sending love. Her memory will always be a blessing. Baruch dyan emet.
Valerie Sherman
September 2, 2025 at 2:59 pmI feel blessed to know her. Her soul was full of love and kindness, and everyone she came in contact with, felt it. So sad that her light will no longer shine but in memories, but she leaves behind all good ones.
Lois Jacowsky
September 2, 2025 at 3:03 pmArlene was a wonderful loving woman. Her smile lit up the room. She & Joel were with us on a friends trip to Israel. Memories I will never forget.
RIP Arlene. You are loved by so many.
Lois & Ken
Sharon Ublansky
September 2, 2025 at 3:04 pmMy profound sympathy for the loss of my dear friend Arlene. She was a bright light in my life and I will always cherish that I could be her friend
Much love to Joel and family. Love Sharon Ublansky
Beverly Silverstone
September 2, 2025 at 3:07 pmArlene was an amazing friend and cousin. We were blessed when she joined the family and was a wonderful partner to Joel. She always had a smile and it was a pleasure to be in her presence. It was a gift to know her.
Suzanne Levy
September 2, 2025 at 3:30 pmI miss her infectious laugh and the joy she brought to all who crossed her path. My love to you and your family and May her memory be a blessing
Priscilla Taylor
September 2, 2025 at 3:30 pmThere is an Arlene- shaped hole in the universe now; that radiant smile and great laugh will be so missed.
Phil and Bea Raskin
September 2, 2025 at 3:37 pmBea and Phil Raskin send their deepest condolences. We met Arlene for the first time 2 years ago at a family reunion in Calgary. She was such a lovely lady. We were glad to call her our cousin.
Rhonda Frenkel
September 2, 2025 at 3:45 pmI miss you so much, my dear sister-friend! I have been blessed to know and love you. I will always remember your beautiful smile and welcoming heart, and I will always love you.
Robert Nelson
September 2, 2025 at 3:54 pmSuch a smile, which I witnessed far too infrequently. A joyful soul has left the earth. Peace, Joel
Milton and Susan Blake
September 2, 2025 at 3:57 pmWonderful friend, teacher and mother during her years in London, Ontario. May her memory be forever filled with special blessings.
DIANE LESLIE
September 2, 2025 at 4:03 pmArlene was a dear friend and I will miss her wonderful smile. My love goes out to her family.
Diane Leslie
Rebecca Froebe
September 2, 2025 at 4:09 pmArlene was one of the first people to welcome us to Lansing, and make us feel at home. She will be sorely missed. I know her memory will be for a blessing to all who knew and loved her.
Rebecca Rogers and family
September 2, 2025 at 4:25 pmJoel, Elissa, Jonah, Alyssa and families. My heart goes out to all of you with the news of Arlene’s passing. She brightened any room she was in with her interest, smile and laughter. She will be so missed by so many. May her memory be a blessing and may you all find comfort in the warm and loving memories you hold dear.
Alene Dixon
September 2, 2025 at 4:48 pmA beautiful picture and a beautiful obituary for a beautiful person. She will be missed by so many, as Arlene was such a loving, giving person. Sending love to Joel and family, always, Alene Dixon
Robin Barfoot
September 2, 2025 at 5:10 pmA bright light is now gone from us all. Her smile was indeed transcendent as was her laugh. My heart goes out to Joel and all her family. A great loss.
David Purvis
September 2, 2025 at 7:09 pmWhat I will miss is the moving and insightful poetry she composed for and shared with the congregation at Kehillat Israel. She had a gift, not only as a poet, but as a keen observer of human emotions, fears, joy, sadness,, love and aspirations. She was our Poet Laureate at KI. And she had incredible strength. It was.remarkable how she coped with her many illnesses and repeated hospitalizations. I know we will carry on, but there will always be an empty place in our community
Megan Whaley
September 2, 2025 at 7:38 pmI remember Arlene leaning close to me and pointing to the margins of the books we were reading to captivate my attention towards little paths less travelled. I am missing feeling distracted and day dreamy next to her.
Linda Losik
September 2, 2025 at 7:57 pmA woman who brighten every room when she entered. Her poetry was moving and insightful. A woman of valor, strength and love. She will be sorely missed. My love to Joel and all her family.
Beverley Zaifman
September 2, 2025 at 8:39 pmArlene was one of the first staff members at the London (Ontario) Community Hebrew Day School that I met when I joined this little school She had a wonderful smile (and looks like she kept it) and a fabulous laugh. She was so encouraging to me as a new teacher.
Donna and Jeff Johnston
September 2, 2025 at 9:30 pmWe only met Arlene a few times when we would visit my sister Susan Turner in London. Even the little I knew her,it was easy to see what a warm and wonderful person she was. 75 is too young.
My sisterSusan, I know, has felt truly blessed to have had Arlene as such a good friend.
Her spirit will live on through all the people whose lives she touched
Susan and Steve Turner
September 3, 2025 at 9:59 amArlene became a very significant part of my life when Elissa and our son were babies. It was a case of “Kindred Spirits” immediately; the kids and the moms. Throughout all our moves and life changes we clung fast to each other. The bond was strong and loving. That’s the kind of friend Arlene was. I will never stop missing her.
Fran Yelon
September 3, 2025 at 10:23 amI will miss Arlene’s presence and wit, but memories of her console me. I will picture her around the Mah Jongg table, winning, as usual.
Connie Willis Swix
September 3, 2025 at 12:22 pmArlene was in my YMCA water aerobics class at the Oak Park. Joel was on the other side of the pool swimming and not getting involved with all the ladies. She had an infectious laugh, so much wisdom teaching me more about Judaism (new grandson is Jewish), and we were the same height, so were next to each out laughing about granddaughters, a bit of aches and pains and sharing the same doctor. Arlene was so dear. I will have memories of her sweetness, I always enjoyed seeing her. Joel, you had a jewel of a wife, she was a great grandmother to the children and so proud of her family. I am so sad for you.
Adrienne Wein
September 3, 2025 at 5:55 pmI will always remember her smile, hugs and great words of wisdom. She taught me how to play mahj on a Sunday afternoon and we spent many days after playing. She will always be missed.
Betsy Gamburg and Phil Cohen
September 4, 2025 at 10:11 amOur hearts are heavy without Arlene. Her smile, her loving heart, her kindness…her friendship was a gift and we will miss her so much. It’s still so hard to believe but her memory will always be a source of love. May her memory always be a blessing.
Lisa M Ostrander
September 4, 2025 at 12:12 pmMrs. Sharkey,
Thank you for being such a bright light to all. Thank you for teachin g my daughters about Hanukkah. Thank you for your NAMI advocacy. Thank you for always caring and being just a genuinely beautiful human. You will be very missed. RIH!
Barb Ariens
September 4, 2025 at 6:46 pmWhen our children decided to marry I wondered what kind of Mother-in -law she would have. When we met the Sharkeys I knew that Sheffa(Christa) had hit the jackpot. There could be none better and I also gained a dear friend I’ve never met anyone that could affect another person so much with her beautiful smile. Arlene I wish we could have had that last talk but you know I loved you
Sheffa Ariens
September 4, 2025 at 7:06 pmDear Arlene,
You are the best mother-in-law a woman could wish for. Warm, kind, generous and eternally welcoming. That smile that lit up your whole face, arms always ready for a hug.
Your family expanded, grandchildren multiplied, all under your loving care. I can see you in my mind, beaming, with all your relations surrounding you with love.
We stopped being in-laws, but you reassured me that I would always be family, and I felt the love. Your smile, kindness and generosity will always live inside me, as an inspiration for how to love fiercely.
Elise and Howard Masur
September 5, 2025 at 2:56 pmArlene was a special person of great love and great joy. We have been the best of friends for 54 years and shared so many happy times together–when we were young with Arlene and Ken, later with Arlene and Elissa, and for many wonderful years with Arlene and Joel. Relating to people, really seeing them and their souls, was her superpower, and we loved her. Arlene is always bathed in sunshine in our memories.
Always in our hearts–
Elise & Howie
Mindy Smith
September 6, 2025 at 2:29 pmArlene and Joel were two of the first people to welcome me and my daughter Jenny to KI. Her warmth and ready smile made us feel that we had found our religious home among gentle, loving, and like-minded people. She will be missed.
Mindy Smith and Jenny Crakes
Joel Kopel
September 6, 2025 at 3:31 pmMy sincerest condolences to Joel and all of your family.
Arlene was the brightest of souls at every occasion I had the privilege of being at from childhood, to the Calgary reunion in 2023. She was the most welcoming and loving person in any room and I always felt comfort and loved in her company. She was deeply devoted to family and I will miss her dearly. All my love to you, Joel, and the family.
Annette Weinshank
September 7, 2025 at 9:33 amEvery Shabbat morning that we were at KI services together, I looked forward to being greeted by Arlene with her signature beaming smile and serious hug. It is a forever memory,
Marc Lao
September 7, 2025 at 10:19 amArlene’s laughter, warmth, and loving kindness always made me feel like part of her family. The memory of Arlene will live with me as an example of how to be, and I will miss her presence.
Elberts
September 7, 2025 at 10:43 amReading all the loving comments, it is striking how many lives Arlene touched and how much light she brought to so many. She will be greatly missed, but the love she spread through the world will last for years and years.